I’VE DECIDED TO DO MY WORK…
While watching an episode (accidentally) of Oprah’s Life Class, I came across an interview that she was holding with actress Gabrielle Union. In the piece, Gabrielle was speaking about how, in her past, she was a true-life mean girl. She would be so jealous of other women in the business, that she’d spread rumors, speak ill of them, just tear them down…for no reason at all…well, but for that thing called the green-eyed monster (and you all know how much I detest her). It wasn’t the part about her jealousy that struck a chord in me, it was the moment she said a friend convinced her that it was time that she “worked on herself.” Now, c’mon, if someone is telling us that we should work on ourselves, then they must be noticing some pret–ty poor behavior coming from us.
One day, in the midst of tearing another woman down, Gabrielle says that her “friend” walks over, and pulls her aside (from her audience). The questions the friend asked, caused Gabrielle to take a hard look at herself. “What did you just gain by tearing that woman down?” the friend asked. “Did your house get any bigger? Are you driving a better car all of a sudden? Did money magically just fall into your pockets out of nowhere?” the friend went on. Gabrielle responded, “No.” It was at that moment she said, that she vowed to change herself, to become a better person; one who would be interested in lifting people up and not happy to tear them down. She admitted to reveling in hearing negative stories about others. It pleased her. But, she didn’t want that feeling anymore. She said, she wanted her walk to match her talk.
I often speak on support. “Support of others before ourselves,” is often my mantra. I enjoy lifting people up and I’ve never had any interest in tearing anyone down. It’s not who I am. I have always wanted my talk to mirror my walk. I have done a decent job of that, but you know what, we all can stand to do a little more work on ourselves. Maybe not in the same department as Gabrielle Union, but there are some of you who fall right into her old category. Go on, this is the time to admit it. Come clean. Gabrielle did. In the midst of accepting an award, she stood on a stage and told the world how she had been “pretending” for so long. She hadn’t been a nice person to others, and she admitted it. She came clean and spoke her truths. But, she was only able to do this AFTER SHE DID HER WORK ON HERSELF.
I write this blog today to ask you all to join me in doing the work on ourselves. As I mentioned above, there’s always room for us to improve. We spend tons of time getting better at our favorite sport, or trying to improve ourselves for that promotion we want, so why not work just as hard to improve US on the inside for us? We just need to stand in a really clean mirror and take a hard look at ourselves. What is that thing that you want to change about you? What is that thing that you don’t like about you? And, what is that thing that you wished wasn’t apart of you? And I don’t mean anything physical.
I’ll start this party, I have no problem with that. The one thing I want to change about me is my harshness (at times). I like to say that God gave me the gift of “seeing” people for who they truly are. That means, I believe what people show me, and not so much what they tell me. Ever heard this phrase: “When someone shows you who they are, believe them”? I have also said before that God didn’t give me much patience, but what I have learned is this… God doesn’t give us patience, he gives us OPPORTUNITIES to be patient. It’s up to us whether or not we accept those opportunities.
I’m closing now, but I have left a pretty big challenge for you all. Notice I didn’t say “for some of you,” I said ALL, because we all have something that we need to work on. Go stand in your mirror, or go sit on your floor with your eyes closed, and take a really good look inside. What is that “thing?” Are you a compulsive liar? Are you too critical of others? Do you find it hard to be honest about anything? (I mean, is your name really Susan?) Do you yell at your kids too much? Are you a cheater? Do you berate your significant other publicly? Whatever it is, I feel confident that you want it gone and you will work hard to make it so. Put on your toolbelts and let’s do the work, people. Our minds are made up! I can just feel it!
I’d like to hear from you because your thing just might be someone else’s thing that they are too afraid, or too ashamed to admit. You can help them come clean. Go on, start that party below in the comments section.
Make it a great day, people…or not. The choice is all yours!