Ya’ Gotta Admire And Respect A Man (or Woman) Who Refuses To Sugarcoat S#@!!

Ben Affleck

Remember when this guy was just a cute, new kid on the block actor, alongside his buddy Matt Damon?  Well, Ben Affleck is still cute, but he’s no kid.  He’s a father, a husband and a man who speaks his mind!  Recently, I happened upon an article (which I didn’t read fully) about a spat that he had, or is having with “Real Time” host, Bill Maher.  I won’t get into the specifics of that spat, because again, I didn’t read the article fully.  What caught my eye, though, was this statement from Ben:  “I think I’d rather tell the truth and say what I believe in and make people unhappy, than sort of pretend to think something else to accommodate them and try to be liked.  That’s just the way it goes and I don’t think I’m any great champion of anything, but if they’re going to put me on a show, I’m going to say what I think.”  People, when I read those words, I fell in love with Jennifer Garner’s husband.  (Pardon me, Jen).

Too many times in life, we try to accommodate others even at the expense of our own selves.  At the expense of our beliefs and our standards,  we cower and compromise ourselves to make others feel taller.  We say what others want to hear so that we don’t “upset” or “set someone off.”  We dare not disagree, for fear of being ostracized or publicly humiliated.  People, if no one has shared this with you today, let me be the first:  Stop “sugarcoatin’ sh#@!.”  Ever hear the old adage:  “Stand for something or fall for anything”?  Well, it’s true.  Either you voice your own opinion and stand your ground for what you believe in, or anyone can tell (sell) you anything.  I’m sorry folks, but that has not, is not, nor will it ever be ME!

I hear comments all day long that I intimidate people because of my demeanor and confident attitude.  But here’s a little secret: no one can make you feel small or inferior without your permission…not even me.  I am not responsible for the way others feel.  I am kind, I am pleasant, I am super-friendly, but I am also no-nonsense when it comes to BS and I am very brazen in my speech and my thoughts.  I say what needs to be said, and most often, it is what others want or need to say, but are too afraid to do it.  (Don’t let the word “brazen” fool or frighten you…NJ is also one classy lady).  Here are some points I’m trying to make:

*There comes a time in life when you have to be truest to you.

*Life is too short to live it trying to please others.

*Life should be more about being honest and sincere in your works, your deeds and your words, not “fearing that you won’t be liked” because of your works, your deeds and your words.

How boring the world would be if we all thought the same thoughts, spoke the same words, and were too afraid to challenge or debate another’s way of thinking if it clashes with our own thought process.  I always challenge and encourage those around me to speak up and to share what they feel, even in the midst of my strong mind and attitude.  My fellow board members at Rave Reviews Book Club can attest to that. We may not always agree, but it’s grand to know that we are all capable and unafraid to speak our beautiful minds, in spite of how it all turns out in the end.

Stop trying so hard to please others, and just live honestly in your truths.  It’s what I do, and seems as if it’s what that cutie, Ben Affleck does, too.  Speak your mind, speak your truths and don’t be afraid to walk in those truths…because those who matter won’t mind and those who mind, SHOULDN’T MATTER!

If they’re doing it respectfully, ya’ gotta admire & respect a man (or woman) who refuses to Sugarcoat S#@!  Remember, SUGARCOATIN’ IS FOR CANDY & PACIFYIN’ IS FOR KIDS!  “Yes, I Said It!”

You, go, Ben!!!


  1. Shirley Harris-Slaughter

    Bill Mayer made a statement to the effect that if no muslim speaks out about the terrorist attacks on civilians then all are guilty by virtue of their silence. I didn’t particularly have much love in my heart for Ben Affleck for accusing Bill of being a bigot or something similarly distasteful…lumping all muslims in the same bag. One thing you can say about Bill is that he speaks his mind too. And so Nonnie while I get your point, I have to side with Bill. I too have been wondering where are the muslim leaders? Why are they not condeming these horrible acts. Maybe they are afraid. But who better to speak out than these people? That’s all I’m sayin.


  2. Nonnie, you are a lady to my own heart. I for one do not bite my words when it comes to saying it as it is. You may make enemies doing that, but at least you will know the cause of your disagreement. Speaking the truth frees the mind.


  3. That’s so ironic, Nonnie! I read the same article on Yahoo today and thought of you:) Great minds do think alike! I’ve always loved Ben and Jennifer anyway – they bring out the best in each other.


    • Hi, Traci! I actually like the way Ben and Jennifer advocate for what they believe in, and I feel as if they bring out the best in all of us. I love their sense of family, how protective they are of their children and each other. Thanks so much for stopping by, Traci, and thanks for thinking of me when you read something of substance instead of thinking of me when you read a cartoon…LOL


  4. Nicely and without coating said. The joy of being on my own away from organized commerce is being able to tell it like it is without having to suffer the consequences of being out of step. Too many times I told the truth only to be given corrective conditioning since the truth was not a popular item. Thanks for this.


    • The truth is never popular. Which is why, it’s the only way to go! I always say: “I don’t have to be politically correct. I just have to be correct.” When you throw the “political” into it, you’re behaving in a way that’s only pleasing others, not so much yourself. Thanks for sharing, John!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Oh my, Nonnie…go girl!!! I’m a bit jealous of Ben, though…


  6. Well said Nonnie!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: